Friday, May 13, 2011
I smiled as we hung up the phone. I had a few tears in my eyes, but they were tears of joy not off sadness. As soon as I hung up our 45 minute conversation my phone automatically prompted to add this unknown number into my phone book. I stared at it intently thinking "maybe it's time I add this number back into my address book". I stared at it too long, because the prompt went away. I smiled anyways...because I knew that's not a number I would forget anytime soon. It's been itched in my memory like a tatoo. I have had many memories with this number. I have called it endless amounts of times....texted it more times than I could recall...fought with it....cried with it...laughed... broke up with it...made up with it.... even fell in love with the person who this number belonged too. So you see regardless of if I added it or not didn't make much of a difference, because it has left it's mark in my life. So I put my phone down wiped away the few tears that has formed in my eyes, and laid down with the satisfaction of knowing that even when you think all hope is gone, God has a way of turning it around. It was never the ending I wanted, but it's the ending I needed.
Thursday, May 5, 2011
In my late teen age and early 20's the closest thing to a religious experience I received weekly was hitting up the hottest parties of Dallas and it's surrounding areas. I fellowshipped with my weekly party friends, and danced like David danced. During this time of "fellowship" I have had the opportunity to meet some interesting people. People that I would not have met other wise. These people intrigued me, interested me, and most importantly impressed me. One of the most impressive types of people I met during this time were the ones that partied hard, but when we sat down to have intimate conversations they would share their religious overviews. They knew GOD, they could quote scriptures, and they seemed so comfortable with the fact that they knew of this GOD. I was mesmerized...I wished I were more like them...I wished I too could quote scriptures, and knew a Christian song or two (that came out in the recent years instead of 1999). But I didn't, I was just another lost soul....hurt by church, and it's people, and didn't care about being saved.
Fast forward four and half years: The very thing I admired in people is the very thing I detest about Christianity. In the past four and half years GOD has started to do a work in me where I began to know him more for myself. He started dealing with my personal demons, and started to cover my past walk of shame with his Grace. The more I got to know him the more I realized how the people I once admired were a walking contradiction of who HE is. He isn't for people who sleep around with different women all the time, or folks who defile their body, and mind. These couple of days I have been walking on edge. I see so much of Christianity being defiled, and corrupted. People who tweek the word of GOD to fit their lifestyle. In fact there has been many instances within the past week where I just wanted to shut people up, and tell them "No boo that's not GOD that's just your flesh. And if you think that's GOD then we don't serve the same GOD".
My last semester of college as I sat in the library with a group of people who became good friends of mine in that class started talking about phone applications. One of them said "They have a Bible app now can you believe it?" To which I replied "They sure do I have it on my phone" I knew as soon as I said it she regretted saying that out loud, but I was not the type to take offense to such things. As soon as I showed my group the phone with the Bible app in the main menu my guy friend goes "Mmmhmmm I hear about girls like you". I must say that's not the first time I have heard that however, each time I hear that I'm thinking I don't know what you've heard, but I follow Christ. Then I got to thinking there are so many other people out there who are like the group of people I hung out with back in Dallas, and when the outside world looks in that's what they think Christianity is all about. A community full of posers, and if you are a true believer then you are judgmental or too religious.
Well I'm here to set the record straight not all Christian do whatever they want,and then claim GOD. Trust me I'm not saying I was or even am perfect. I have made plenty of mistakes throughout my lifetime, and continue to make it, but as I continued to get to know GOD his words let me know of there's a big difference between knowing off me and knowing me personally.
Romans Chapter 6
1 What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? 2 By no means! We are those who have died to sin; how can we live in it any longer? 3 Or don’t you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? 4 We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life.
Fast forward four and half years: The very thing I admired in people is the very thing I detest about Christianity. In the past four and half years GOD has started to do a work in me where I began to know him more for myself. He started dealing with my personal demons, and started to cover my past walk of shame with his Grace. The more I got to know him the more I realized how the people I once admired were a walking contradiction of who HE is. He isn't for people who sleep around with different women all the time, or folks who defile their body, and mind. These couple of days I have been walking on edge. I see so much of Christianity being defiled, and corrupted. People who tweek the word of GOD to fit their lifestyle. In fact there has been many instances within the past week where I just wanted to shut people up, and tell them "No boo that's not GOD that's just your flesh. And if you think that's GOD then we don't serve the same GOD".
My last semester of college as I sat in the library with a group of people who became good friends of mine in that class started talking about phone applications. One of them said "They have a Bible app now can you believe it?" To which I replied "They sure do I have it on my phone" I knew as soon as I said it she regretted saying that out loud, but I was not the type to take offense to such things. As soon as I showed my group the phone with the Bible app in the main menu my guy friend goes "Mmmhmmm I hear about girls like you". I must say that's not the first time I have heard that however, each time I hear that I'm thinking I don't know what you've heard, but I follow Christ. Then I got to thinking there are so many other people out there who are like the group of people I hung out with back in Dallas, and when the outside world looks in that's what they think Christianity is all about. A community full of posers, and if you are a true believer then you are judgmental or too religious.
Well I'm here to set the record straight not all Christian do whatever they want,and then claim GOD. Trust me I'm not saying I was or even am perfect. I have made plenty of mistakes throughout my lifetime, and continue to make it, but as I continued to get to know GOD his words let me know of there's a big difference between knowing off me and knowing me personally.
Romans Chapter 6
1 What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? 2 By no means! We are those who have died to sin; how can we live in it any longer? 3 Or don’t you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? 4 We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life.
Sunday, May 1, 2011
He IS....
Found this on youtube and thought it was totally worth sharing
God Throughout the BIBLE
In Genesis, Jesus Christ is the Seed of the Woman who will crush the head of the serpent.
In Exodus, He is the Passover Lamb.
In Leviticus, He is our High Priest.
In Numbers, He is the pillar of cloud by day, and the pillar of fire by night.
In Deuteronomy, He is the Prophet & Mediator like Moses.
In Joshua, He is the Captain of our Salvation.
In Judges, He is our Judge and Law-Giver.
In Ruth, He is our Kinsmen-Redeemer.
In 1 and 2 Samuel, He is our trusted Prophet.
In Kings and Chronicles, He is our Reigning King.
In Ezra, He is the rebuilder of the broken-down walls of human life.
In Esther, He is our Mordechai.
In Job, He is our innocent Sufferer
In Psalms, He is our Shepherd.
In Proverbs and Ecclesiastes, He is our Wisdom.
In Song of Solomon, He is our loving Bridegroom.
In Isaiah, He is the Prince of Peace.
In Jeremiah, He is our Righteousness
In Lamentations, He is our weeping Prophet.
In Ezekiel, He is the Son of Man
In Daniel, He is the fourth man in the fiery furnace.
In Hosea, He is the Faithful Husband forever married to the back-slider.
In Joel, He is the Baptizer of the Holy Ghost and fire.
In Amos, He is our Burden-Bearer.
In Obadiah, He is Mighty to Save.
In Jonah, He is our Great Foreign Missionary.
In Micah, He is the Messenger with Beautiful Feet.
In Nahum, He is the Avenger of God's Elect.
In Habbakuk, He is God's Evangelist crying "In the midst of the years, revive your work!"
In Zepheniah, He is our Saviour.
In Haggai, He the Restorer of God's Lost Heritage.
In Zechariah, He is the Fountain opened up in the House of David for sin and uncleanliness.
In Malachi, He is the Son of Righteousness rising with healing in His wings.
In Matthew, He is the King of the Jews.
In Mark, He is the Servant.
In Luke, He is the Friend of Sinners
In John, He is the Word of God.
In Acts, He is the Saviour of the World.
In Romans, He is the Righteousness of God.
In 1 Corinthians, He is the Rock giving us water in the wilderness.
In 2 Corinthians, He is the Fulfillment of all God's Promises
In Galatians, He is the Promised Seed of Abraham
In Ephesians, He is the Head of the Church.
In Philippians, He is your Joy.
In Colossians, He is your Completeness.
In 1 and 2 Thessalonians, He is your Hope.
In 1 Timothy, He is your Faith.
In 2 Timothy, He is your Stability.
In Philemon, He is your Benefactor.
In Titus, He is Truth.
In Hebrews, He is the Author and Perfector of our faith.
In James, He is the Power behind your faith.
In 1 Peter, He is your Example.
In 2 Peter, He is your Purity.
In 1 John, He is your Life.
In 2 John, He is your Teacher.
In 3 John, He is your Motivation.
In Jude, He is the Foundation of your faith.
In Revelation, He is your Coming King.
God Throughout the BIBLE
In Genesis, Jesus Christ is the Seed of the Woman who will crush the head of the serpent.
In Exodus, He is the Passover Lamb.
In Leviticus, He is our High Priest.
In Numbers, He is the pillar of cloud by day, and the pillar of fire by night.
In Deuteronomy, He is the Prophet & Mediator like Moses.
In Joshua, He is the Captain of our Salvation.
In Judges, He is our Judge and Law-Giver.
In Ruth, He is our Kinsmen-Redeemer.
In 1 and 2 Samuel, He is our trusted Prophet.
In Kings and Chronicles, He is our Reigning King.
In Ezra, He is the rebuilder of the broken-down walls of human life.
In Esther, He is our Mordechai.
In Job, He is our innocent Sufferer
In Psalms, He is our Shepherd.
In Proverbs and Ecclesiastes, He is our Wisdom.
In Song of Solomon, He is our loving Bridegroom.
In Isaiah, He is the Prince of Peace.
In Jeremiah, He is our Righteousness
In Lamentations, He is our weeping Prophet.
In Ezekiel, He is the Son of Man
In Daniel, He is the fourth man in the fiery furnace.
In Hosea, He is the Faithful Husband forever married to the back-slider.
In Joel, He is the Baptizer of the Holy Ghost and fire.
In Amos, He is our Burden-Bearer.
In Obadiah, He is Mighty to Save.
In Jonah, He is our Great Foreign Missionary.
In Micah, He is the Messenger with Beautiful Feet.
In Nahum, He is the Avenger of God's Elect.
In Habbakuk, He is God's Evangelist crying "In the midst of the years, revive your work!"
In Zepheniah, He is our Saviour.
In Haggai, He the Restorer of God's Lost Heritage.
In Zechariah, He is the Fountain opened up in the House of David for sin and uncleanliness.
In Malachi, He is the Son of Righteousness rising with healing in His wings.
In Matthew, He is the King of the Jews.
In Mark, He is the Servant.
In Luke, He is the Friend of Sinners
In John, He is the Word of God.
In Acts, He is the Saviour of the World.
In Romans, He is the Righteousness of God.
In 1 Corinthians, He is the Rock giving us water in the wilderness.
In 2 Corinthians, He is the Fulfillment of all God's Promises
In Galatians, He is the Promised Seed of Abraham
In Ephesians, He is the Head of the Church.
In Philippians, He is your Joy.
In Colossians, He is your Completeness.
In 1 and 2 Thessalonians, He is your Hope.
In 1 Timothy, He is your Faith.
In 2 Timothy, He is your Stability.
In Philemon, He is your Benefactor.
In Titus, He is Truth.
In Hebrews, He is the Author and Perfector of our faith.
In James, He is the Power behind your faith.
In 1 Peter, He is your Example.
In 2 Peter, He is your Purity.
In 1 John, He is your Life.
In 2 John, He is your Teacher.
In 3 John, He is your Motivation.
In Jude, He is the Foundation of your faith.
In Revelation, He is your Coming King.
Friday, April 29, 2011
N.O.T.W
Romans 12:2- GOD'S Word Translation
Don't become like the people of this world. Instead, change the way you think. Then you will always be able to determine what God really wants-what is good, pleasing, and perfect.
The word of GOD says that once we are in him we are no longer of this world, and that we are new creatures. I often find myself wondering if this is true why do I (can't speak for anyone else but myself) spend so much time being off this world,and doing things of this world. If the road is so narrow then why do I conduct construction on it to widen it to fit my lifestyle?
It's funny how we justify the things we do like for example: recently a friend of mine came back to the church, and really started getting into the things of GOD. When I was going through an episode or didn't feel like being very Christians towards others I used her as a crutch. Instead of thinking so and so in new in CHRIST I should be the one setting an example for her I thought well so and so's parent is in the ministry and they act this way so it must be okay for me to do it too. Knowing good and well it wasn't right for me to act/feel that way. The truth of the matter is I am the representative of the Kingdom, and if my duties include not becoming of this world, BUT becoming a light for it then I should do so. That means my actions, attitude, and even the things that come out of my mouth should be considered twice, because in reality just like I used my friend as a crutch to get away with how I felt someone else is watching me...waiting for that opportunity when I can become a crutch to them. By no means am I saying that I should be perfect 24/7 never make a mistake, for if we didn't make mistakes then we wouldn't need CHRIST. But me personally (and this is something I feel very strongly about) I don't think we should cuss, sleep around, say what we want, do what we want, and still say we are a CHRISTIANS, because that is a total mis-representation of who CHRIST is, and what he did for us on that cross.
Don't become like the people of this world. Instead, change the way you think. Then you will always be able to determine what God really wants-what is good, pleasing, and perfect.
The word of GOD says that once we are in him we are no longer of this world, and that we are new creatures. I often find myself wondering if this is true why do I (can't speak for anyone else but myself) spend so much time being off this world,and doing things of this world. If the road is so narrow then why do I conduct construction on it to widen it to fit my lifestyle?
It's funny how we justify the things we do like for example: recently a friend of mine came back to the church, and really started getting into the things of GOD. When I was going through an episode or didn't feel like being very Christians towards others I used her as a crutch. Instead of thinking so and so in new in CHRIST I should be the one setting an example for her I thought well so and so's parent is in the ministry and they act this way so it must be okay for me to do it too. Knowing good and well it wasn't right for me to act/feel that way. The truth of the matter is I am the representative of the Kingdom, and if my duties include not becoming of this world, BUT becoming a light for it then I should do so. That means my actions, attitude, and even the things that come out of my mouth should be considered twice, because in reality just like I used my friend as a crutch to get away with how I felt someone else is watching me...waiting for that opportunity when I can become a crutch to them. By no means am I saying that I should be perfect 24/7 never make a mistake, for if we didn't make mistakes then we wouldn't need CHRIST. But me personally (and this is something I feel very strongly about) I don't think we should cuss, sleep around, say what we want, do what we want, and still say we are a CHRISTIANS, because that is a total mis-representation of who CHRIST is, and what he did for us on that cross.
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Psalms 37: 23
The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD: and he delighteth in his way.
Last week I sat at my mechanics lobby area slightly sad about what I had to deal with in life. The people I don't bother, and have left alone in life kept coming back to take me down, and leave me down. I've prayed for them, I prayed for myself to change if it was me. Every time I was done praying for the situation I got a phone call about how the situation has worsen, so I started to just leave it alone and let GOD be GOD. The situation never left me alone always came knocking at my door regardless if I answered or not it kept knocking. I just didn't understand why GOD hasn't taken this out of my life. I mean I'm a pretty good person GOD. I do the best I can I try to lead a lifestyle pleasing to you.  Then today as I sat in service our pastor asked us to hear this repeatedly over and over again. He quoted Psalms 37:23, and broke it down in a way I have never looked at it before. I always read the scripture and thought "Oh okay you do the right thing, live a life that is pleasing to GOD then he will guide you". I never put my situation in to this scripture, and when I put my situation in to this scripture this is how it's translated. Every trial and tribulation you have gone through and are going through it was and is being guided by me. Even when you didn't know me or see me I was there taking the steps to get you where you need to be. Somehow being stuck in my situation didn't seem so bad after that. He has a reason why this keeps happening in my life, and I can honestly say I HAVE NO IDEA what his reason is, but the reminder was good. To know not even a single detail goes without his reason and knowledge. |
Sunday, April 17, 2011
OMG! I have so much to write about. Of course the day I wanted to write my lap top wasn't with me, and the house computer was acting retarded....none the less I will write it all soon. Just wanted to post this really quick. Something chessy, something sweet....something SATC
His hello was the end of her endings
Her laugh was the first step down the aisle
His hand would be hers to hold forever
His forever was as simple as her smile
He said "she was what was missing"
She said, instantly she knew
She was a question to be answered
And his answer was "I do"
His hello was the end of her endings
Her laugh was the first step down the aisle
His hand would be hers to hold forever
His forever was as simple as her smile
He said "she was what was missing"
She said, instantly she knew
She was a question to be answered
And his answer was "I do"
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Written 3/21/2011
As I laid in my bed late last night surfing the web. I saw yet another acquitance on facebook bounce from one relationship to another. As I sat their pondering about this one of the most crude thoughts formed in my mind. And as crude as it is, it made complete sense to me.
If we treated dating a little bit more like a business deal then we would be in for less of a heart break. Now hear me out...I'm not saying be an emotion Nazi, but to more knowing I supposed is the word I'm looking for. Here's the deal....your first conversation with a person tells you a lot about them. You don't need to sugar coat it for them they've already laid it out on the table (let's look at this as the contract). Now after seeing what you see why sugar coat it and go into only to realize months down the line that it wasn't what you wanted in the first place. Then you get the reputation of someone who bounces in and out of relationship...a flake.
My friends tend to get on my case about not giving people chances. That I should go out more often, and that if anything it's at least a free dinner. You see I don't look at it as a free dinner...I look at it as an obligation...I look at it as people saying "she just cant decides she's always dating around"....I also do this because I'm pretty sure of what I DON'T want. You see most guys that try to talk to me as soon as they open their mouth and start talking I listen to what comes out of it. How they handle themselves? How they treat people? If none of these matches up why not just be friends or acquittance because clearly I'm not about to lead you on and give you false hope and waste both of our times.
Am I absolutely wrong for thinking this way?
As I laid in my bed late last night surfing the web. I saw yet another acquitance on facebook bounce from one relationship to another. As I sat their pondering about this one of the most crude thoughts formed in my mind. And as crude as it is, it made complete sense to me.
If we treated dating a little bit more like a business deal then we would be in for less of a heart break. Now hear me out...I'm not saying be an emotion Nazi, but to more knowing I supposed is the word I'm looking for. Here's the deal....your first conversation with a person tells you a lot about them. You don't need to sugar coat it for them they've already laid it out on the table (let's look at this as the contract). Now after seeing what you see why sugar coat it and go into only to realize months down the line that it wasn't what you wanted in the first place. Then you get the reputation of someone who bounces in and out of relationship...a flake.
My friends tend to get on my case about not giving people chances. That I should go out more often, and that if anything it's at least a free dinner. You see I don't look at it as a free dinner...I look at it as an obligation...I look at it as people saying "she just cant decides she's always dating around"....I also do this because I'm pretty sure of what I DON'T want. You see most guys that try to talk to me as soon as they open their mouth and start talking I listen to what comes out of it. How they handle themselves? How they treat people? If none of these matches up why not just be friends or acquittance because clearly I'm not about to lead you on and give you false hope and waste both of our times.
Am I absolutely wrong for thinking this way?
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